My Life is Not My Own

It's been quite a while since I've posted on our blog, and this particular post doesn't have anything to do with homeschooling, it's just something that's been on my heart for a while and I felt like writing about. I'm not sure the response this post will get, but I hope you enjoy just a little honesty from a Mama's heart...

I got asked “THE” question again today. There’s always “THE” question that EVERYONE asks in just about every new phase of your life. You know, when you graduate high school, it’s “What college are you going to?” When you’re in college, it’s “What are you studying?” When you’re dating someone, it’s “When are you getting married?” Once you’re married, the question starts immediately, “When are you having kids?” For me, “THE” question right now is, “Are you done?” You see, I have two little boys, 3 and 1, and I am pregnant with our third child, a little girl. Ever since I first found out and announced that we were pregnant again, (after the wide-eyed stares and looks of unbelief) so many people have asked if this baby will be our last. I am always unsure of how to answer the question, because it’s complicated, and people aren’t prepared for my answer.

                I’ll be the first to admit, being a full-time mommy is NOT easy! Answering the unending questions, being up all hours of the night, changing endless diapers, disciplining, training, correcting, loving, ALWAYS putting someone else’s needs BEFORE and ABOVE my own, even when that need is putting a toy back together for the 1000^th time when you know you’ll have to do it again in five minutes and it means I have to wait to go to the bathroom (even though I’ve needed to go for over an hour). Being a parent means laying down your life every moment of the day so that someone else may know love. The selfish, comfort-craving, part of me wants to answer “THE” question with, “YES! This is it for us!” But, it’s just not something I can say. Many years ago, I gave my life to Christ. We, as Christians use that phrase a lot, but I think sometimes we lose sight of what that really looks like. Giving my life to Christ means, my body, my thoughts, my goals, my dreams, my FAMILY, my words, are not mine any more. I have laid all of that down at His feet and humbly asked Him to take what I have and use it to glorify His name. So, instead, I answer “I don’t know, we’re just waiting to see what God will do.” Surprisingly, even among Christian friends, that answer doesn’t always go over well.

                So often, we shy away from things in life that are difficult or challenging. If we know it’s going to cost us a lot, we try our very best to make it easier or more comfortable in any way possible. Instead of asking God to change our hearts to look like His, we try to change our circumstances. We try to add or subtract things from our schedules, hoping that by doing so, we will be happier.  But I am reminded that Christ laid down His life for me, and it WAS NOT comfortable! His very prayer being that not his will, but God’s will be done. The disciples gave up their lives for Christ, and it was NOT easy!

We refer to God as “Our Father” or “Our Daddy in Heaven”, “Abba”. Even though God has millions upon millions of children, He has NEVER said NO to accepting another one. He knows all the frustrations of being a parent, and especially being a parent to hard-headed children, children that not only disobey Him, but betray Him, over and over again, and yet, He ALWAYS says “YES” to one more.

                Once we turn our lives over to Christ, we aren’t supposed to be living by our own strength any more. He promises that He will carry our burdens, that He will never leave us or forsake us, when we are weary, He will give us rest, and my favorite, He has given us EVERYTHING we need for life (2 Peter 1:3)!!! So, even though having little ones is extremely exhausting and difficult, His word reminds me that He is with me and I may experience His love, faithfulness, and power EVERYDAY in every moment with my children.

                So, what am I saying? Am I saying everyone should have as many kids as the Duggars? No, I am strictly saying that as Christians we should rely on Christ to guide our decisions for EVERY area of life. Not just how many children we have, but when to have them, where they come from, AND every other detail, what to make for dinner, what clothes to buy, where and when and if to go on vacation or a mission trip, what to speak or not speak to others, EVERYTHING belongs to Him! And when we give every area over to Him, we can watch Him make miracles out of our lives, out of little moments and big moments, we can see His hand at work.

                After being a mom for only four years, I have been stretched to the limit in ways I never imagined! I have lost my temper, cried for hours, gone on minutes of sleep for days, felt like the biggest failure as a parent, and SO much more. BUT, I have also seen parts of God’s heart that I have never seen (and would have never seen without having kids) before, those difficult moments have driven me to my knees before God, driving me closer and closer to Him. And after all, isn’t that what the Christian life is all about? Knowing Him more, understanding more of His heart so that we can show it to others?

                So, let us inspire each other anew and encourage one another to pursue God’s life. I KNOW that many people who have asked me “THE” question, have only done so out of love and concern. They see that I am tired, frazzled, and a bit over-whelmed at some points (and especially how sick I was during the early stages of pregnancy) and they don’t want to see me suffer, so to speak. But I want to encourage all of us to take a different turn. When we see frazzled and worn-out mommies and daddies, remind them of God’s promises. Remind them that they WILL be rewarded for their faithfulness and hard-work. Remind them that with every diaper change, every booboo kissed, every tantrum corrected, they are serving Christ, and in one of the most honoring ways, for it often goes unnoticed by the rest of the world.

                My answer to “THE” question for this phase in life, is…”I don’t know.” This very well could be our last or it could be the third of ten. But we are seeking the Lord to find His will every moment. And I rest in the promise that He knows the plans He has for us and they are NOT plans to harm us, but plans to bring us hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11) We would love to adopt a child from another country, or maybe even be foster parents. But, it’s just not up to us. We are relying on God to guide us every step of the way to provide the strength, courage, energy, and finances that we need, right when we need it. Because He always has, and He always will, and that is the legacy we want to leave for our children. We want them to see that God is faithful, so that they may teach their children, and their grandchildren and their great-grandchildren ….

 

Finishing up the Generosity

    I've been putting off posting these last two weeks of generosity because my husband and I have been working on our blog site. So, you may have noticed a few changes on the page, and you've probably also noticed that those little add ons lead to...nothing! Haha, unfortunately, my husband and I are blog challenged. We both desire to make more of our little warrior spot on the web, but just can't seem to understand all the little steps to make that happen. So, here's a little shout out for help, if you read our blog and you are blog savvy and can offer us any help, please let us know. We would greatly appreciate it! Now, on to Warrior Wednesdays...

  For our field trip on generosity, Adam took the boys to Target. Our church youth group was doing a service project for our local mission, collecting items they are in need of most. So, we joined in!

 This has to be one of my favorite pictures of Jayce. Holding onto his items for the mission, and doing it IN STYLE!

 

He always loves to help put the items on the checkout counter.

 

 

And here he is with all of the goodies, ready to bring them to the church for the mission.

 

 

  Adam did a wonderful job explaining that there are some people who don't have certain things and we should help them in any way God leads us to. This is generosity. When the boys came home with their bags, Jayce was so excited to show Auntie Googie "the things they got for the people who don't have any."

 

 

  For our last week studying generosity, what better Person to learn from, than Christ Himself?  Throughout the week, we used our Resurrection Eggs. Jayce was so excited to open a new egg everyday, and now he can tell the entire Easter story all by himself. They are a GREAT resource! On Wednesday, we made Resurrection Rolls.

Even though Jayce doesn't like marshmallows, he's always so excited to get them and asks over and over if he can eat one. It always ends the same way, one bite, then into the trash haha. That's okay, maybe one of these days he'll find he likes them.

We dip the marshmallow (which represents Christ) into melted butter then into cinnamon and sugar (which represents the spices used for his body).

Wrap the marshmallow into a crescent roll (the linens), then place in the oven (the tomb).

When they come out of the oven, the marshmallow is gone, Jesus is RISEN!! HE IS ALIVE!

 



 

Josiah particularly LOVED these little treats! He would have eaten them all night if he could!

While the Resurrection Rolls were cooking, we watched What's In the Bible Episode 10, http://whatsinthebible.com/ teaching them about the life and death of Christ. He GENEROUSLY GAVE His life for us! What a joy to walk through this life with these boys and have the honor of teaching them about the greatest event that has ever happened in the history of the world!!

 



A Generous Heart

"Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver."

2 Corinthians 9:7

 

  This month we are trying to teach the boys about about generosity, which we defined as "giving graciously." Sometimes that means giving our time, sometimes it's giving our money, our toys, our help, there are all kinds of ways we can be generous. Our first week we studied the Bible story of the widow's mite in Mark 12:41-44.

 

                                     

Of course, we started out reviewing our Warrior Way

 Then, using Little People, and Jayce and Josiah's big crayon banks, we "acted" out the Widow's mite story. Still not sure that Jayce quite understood, but he listened very closely and loved putting the crayon "banks" in the offering.

 

Second Warrior Wednesday

 This week we learned that generosity can also be helping others. We learned about the penguin and how they all take turns warming each other from the cold. Jayce absolutely LOVED this!!

 He took the little webkinz penguin and warmed EVERY animal out on the table.

 Our little warriors!

 

 

  Sometimes the character traits that we choose to teach our little guys about can be a little difficult to get the idea across to them, but we have seen God faithfully guide our hearts to teach them in creative ways that helps them understand in small ways. Just this morning, Jayce cleaned up a mess that Josiah made and I told him that he was being very generous in helping Josiah clean up, and he understood, he could connect his actions with what we had been learning about and it made him feel so good about what he was doing.

 

  Thank you Lord for the opportunity to teach these sweet little guys! May these moments bless your heart and train them to love and obey Your ways!

Finding Courage

  Our whole purpose of teaching our children about Godly characteristics is, of course, because we want to see those characteristics in them. The more they understand about each one, the better they can choose how to act in every situation life puts them in. I was so excited when Jayce was able to demonstrate COURAGE during the very month we were talking about it. He had his first dental check up! New situations can be scary for our little warrior and he didn't like the sound of going to the dentist one bit! As we discussed what would happen, we told him that it was okay to be a little nervous, but, this was a time he could show courage! With a few tears in his eyes, he climbed into the big blue chair. :)

 The hygienist was AMAZING and made little Jayce feel right at home. He loved being able to wear the cool glasses they gave him and when she let him feel her special tooth cleaning brush, he forgot that Mommy was even in the room. He followed every direction she gave him and he had a great check up! It may be a little step, but, it helped our little guy understand a little more about courage, and we were so proud to see him display it so well!

 

 

  For our fourth and final week of learning about COURAGE, we were blessed to be able to get a personal tour of a FIRESTATION!! I wasn't sure how Jayce was going to do when we went and I wanted him to understand as much as possible, so I started prepping him a few days before. We talked about fire safety and what firemen do and why they drive the special trucks they do.

 

 Our good friend Troy Fox from our beloved church was happy to give Jayce a one-on-one tour and show him the how and why of the whole station!

 Haha, when the lights and siren went off, it got really loud and Jayce wasn't too sure what to think about that!

 We all got to sit inside of an ambulance, Siah got to ride on the stretcher!

 We also got to look at, and touch, some of the special tools the firemen have to use sometimes to get into the houses. The tools were VERY heavy.

 More tools!

 This is what goes on the end of the hoses they use.

 The hat was too heavy for Jayce to wear, so Mr. Troy held it up for him.

 Both of the boys got to sit in the front of the firetruck and learn about all the special switches and buttons.

 Daddy got to try on one of their special coats.

 Mommy too!

We learned that when fully dressed to go to a fire, the fireman's equipment weighs about 100 pounds! They need to make sure they are ready and fit ALL of the time!

 

 

  We had a great time learning about all the big and little details that go into protecting others. Troy also told us some of the scary situations he's been in and how he truly puts his life on the line everyday! WHAT COURAGE! After our trip, I talked to Jayce about how Jesus was also courageous and that is the number one reason we want to have courage, is because we want to be like Christ. Courage is a big word and holds a lot of meaning and we hope to see it more and more in each of us as we grow. Thank you Father for this opportunity to learn more about who YOU are!



The Courage of George Muller

  So, I made the comment on a post last week or the week before about how it can be difficult doing these Bible teaching times because we don't always know if they're listening or learning, but after learning about Togo, Jayce, a couple days later, saw a picture of a sled dog and asked Daddy, "Is that Togo?" He remembered! He listened!! Praise the Lord!! Just a little encouragement for all of you out there trying to instill valuable lessons into your little one's hearts and minds :)

  For Warrior Wednesday this week we learned about the courage of George Muller. Muller was the founder of five homes that accommodated  over 1,722 orphans. Muller never made any requests for financial support. Many times, he received unsolicited food donations only hours before they were needed to feed the children, further strengthening his faith in God. So often, faith in God takes great courage. Even when it's hard to see the good, or the answer, we need to have courage and faith that our God will provide.

 

Grammie and PopPop were able to join us this week. It was hard to get Jayce to fully focus with two of his favorite people there, but we are focusing on consistency and small portions of information each week. This way it's easier for Josiah to be a part of this time too, and as time goes by, we can do more together as we grow in age and patience :)

 

We ended the night by watching the Veggie Tales movie "Gideon" which has a portion about George Muller in it. Since this video is familiar to the boys, it was a very easy way to make the lesson stick a little more.

Next Wednesday will be our last Wednesday studying courage and we are hoping to make a trip to a firehouse to learn about the courage of firefighters. We are so excited to start this new tradition with our family, and although not every night has been perfect, we know God is faithful and we are looking forward to the new lessons He is going to teach us each Wednesday.

 

Celebrating Love and Courage

  For our Warrior Wednesday, we are still learning about COURAGE and we chose to focus on an animal that showed courage. This was GREAT because both of our boys LOVE animals! The animal we chose was Togo, a Siberian Husky who played an instrumental role in saving many lives in an Alaskan village. Togo's sled team ran the longest and most dangerous leg of the relay (91 miles) to bring medicine to help a potentially deadly diphtheria epidemic.

 

 

 It was so neat watching Jayce pay such close attention to the story.

 We looked up videos of actual sled dogs racing through the snow to show the boys what it was like for Togo.

 Josiah loved the videos of the "gogs" (dogs).

 Then we colored pictures of sled dogs together.

 

  We enjoyed our time together learning more about courage and what it means to God and for us. Warrior time is still very much a work in progress as we learn what works best, the best time frame, and how we can get the MOST out of every time we have it. It can be hard sometimes after you put so much effort into something because you're not really sure how much they're actually retaining. We trust that the Lord will take these moments and sow them into the hearts of our little warriors and it will some day bring forth a harvest!

 

A Little Valentine's Fun







 Jayce LOVES to bake! So, we made cookies for all of our family and friends for Valentine's Day to let them know how much we love them and God loves them.

For our Valentine's breakfast, we had heart-shaped pancakes, Jayce mixed up the batter for us!

Josiah's Cat in the Hat Valentine, his favorite!

 

And here's Jayce's little Calliou Valentine, it's a paper doll, or as Daddy prefers, a paper friend.

 

We're spending today learning about God's love for us and how He demonstrates it EVERYDAY and how we can show our love for others as well. We hope you all have a Valentine's Day full of the love of Christ, it's the best kind of Valentine to have!!



Warrior Wednesday

  For a while we have tried to focus on one Godly character trait a month so that the boys are not just learning their ABCs and 123s, but learning the importance of having Godly character through all stages of life. For God's Word says "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." Proverbs 22:6
  It has proved to be a challenge as we've tried to find the "right" way to approach this time. It is something that's very important to us, but we just couldn't seem to find the right time or be consistent with our approach. So, we've started a new experiment called "Warrior Wednesdays". Every Wednesday we spend focused time after dinner, as a family, learning about the character of the month in creative ways.

 We start off our warrior nights by reciting the warrior way. Just a little spoken reminder of how we should be living everyday. Pray. Read the Bible. Obey our parents. Put others first. Just a few simple statements that they can be reminded of during the day while playing, cleaning up, eating dinner, and so on.


 

Here's Daddy and Mike the Knight reading the Warrior Way

 

 

  We decided this Wednesday to "act out" the story of Joshua and the Wall of Jericho using Little People. (We really thought David and Goliath would have been a little more appropriate but Jayce is a little scared of the giant in the story and tends to freak out whenever we even mention it, so we decided this story would work too.)

 

 

We used blocks to make the "wall" of Jericho.

Jayce and Daddy making Joshua and the Israelites march around the wall.



After the wall fell down, Josiah thought it looked like fun so he got down out of my lap to help.

 

Then we colored pictures of Jericho from www.whatsinthebible.com

 

 

  The definition of COURAGE that we chose from Character Sketches is "following difficult instructions in the face of danger." We talked about how Joshua did that and how God honored and rewarded his courage and obedience. We finished up our night with an ice cream treat and look forward to next Wednesday. We know there is so much more to learn and hope that this just becomes an exciting routine to look forward to and build upon.