As some of you know, our little Josiah has been on quite a difficult journey. Just as his RSV and asthma seemed to be calming down, a new challenge started to arise. Out of nowhere he started spitting up, large amounts, and very frequently. Josiah has never been a "
spitter" as some call it, and we were very perplexed as to why it was happening. We hoped for the best for the first couple days, maybe it was something mommy ate or he ate that upset him and it would soon go away. By day five, we were concerned and made a trip to the
dr. Little Josiah had lost weight and now, a new element to the mystery, he wasn't pooping either. They wanted to bring him back two days later to see if his weight continued decreasing and to monitor a little more closely the amount he was spitting up. Two days later, it was confirmed, he had lost three more ounces. A long story short, we made two more doctor visits in the next week and Josiah continued to lose weight and
despite medicines and other tactics, so did his spitting up and not pooping.
The doctor ordered
xrays and some blood tests, and at first my heart began to rejoice "Finally, we might get some answers so we can get closer to how to make my son feel better." Then, the darkness hit, and instead of fighting against it, claiming the promises of the Lord, I crumbled. The fears started swarming, "What if..." would come pounding through my brain with every possible worse-case-scenario. I couldn't think straight, I couldn't sleep, I woke up the next morning and my jaw was sore from clenching it so tightly as I restlessly tossed about. I knew when I was getting ready that morning that something wasn't right, and it had nothing to do with my sick son or the test results, it was me.
I was disobeying my Lord, I wasn't trusting in Him. After all, no matter what the outcome was going to be, was He not still good? He absolutely was and is! NO MATTER WHAT!! Doesn't His Word say to "Consider it pure joy when you face trials of many kinds"? And why does it say that? "For you know the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance MUST finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking ANYTHING." Not lacking ANYTHING? WOW! How many of us would love for someone else to describe us in that way? And who do I know that lacks nothing? MY LORD, MY KING, MY JESUS!! And again, doesn't His Word say that we are to be like Him in ALL things? I WANT to be like Jesus. I MUST trust Him at all costs and rejoice in the fact that I have He who lacks nothing on my side.
So it doesn't matter if the doctors missed something or if they don't know the answers or if the
xrays show something...for my Lord lives in me and He is working all things to bring Him glory and for our good, that is reason enough to rejoice. In ALL things!! My King loves Josiah more than I do, and I
believe that is why He entrusted Josiah to us. He knew we would love him and give him the care he needed.
As it stands, the blood tests came back normal, although spitting up an excessive amount and losing weight, Josiah was not dehydrated and did not have any kind of infection. The
xrays also came back showing nothing!! :) Today, Josiah has had a wonderful day! He hasn't spit up hardly at all!! And for the past two days he has been pooping like normal :) Perhaps the medicine has started to work, maybe he did eat something that he wasn't ready for, (we are switching back to one ingredient foods for another month, then slowly putting him on two ingredient foods, looking for allergic reactions to certain fillers.) we're still not really sure. We are hoping that he keeps getting better and better and the spit up occurs less and less. It has definitely been a difficult road to watch our little warrior be in so much pain and struggle with one thing after another. But, oh what a blessing he is, what a gift! My Lord is good and His ways are PERFECT! Psalm 18:30 and Psalm 33:4 "The Word of the Lord is right and true; He is faithful in ALL He does."
We thank everyone for your prayers and encouragement. I truly believe God gives strength to the weak through friends and family during difficult times. You all have been His loving arms reaching around us. We love you!